As effect of end May, I will be transfered to the grad's group. In my team there are loads of potential ppl from shepherds all the way to CL(i think) It is an honour to serve along side with these great people, individuals which can impact the world. I was praying and again I thought to myself.. "God is really testing me! I had problems opening myself but as I know.. this is something that I have to learn(bit by bit) I'm glad that i had improved [Hmm.. I read afew stuff about Judus Iscariot. I pity such a man that betrayed the son of man with a kiss. Judus had every opportunity to turn away from his sin, he heard numerous appeals from Christ urging him not to do the deed he was planning to do(Jesus parable of the unjust steward, pride, greed) however Judas listened to all if that unmoved. He never applied the lessons. He just kept up his deceit. It makes me reflect upon myself..(mel dude) Before Judas would betray Jesus, he had harden his heart, closed his eye and covered his ear for the warning sign that the Lord had warned. He was spiritually dead. I was wondering, of all those nights that I missed my QT(I dun view it as a ritual) but it had somewhat affected my walk with the Lord. It is not a immediate effect or thougth that Judus would just "okay! I like being a Betrayer okay, I shall betray Jesus" It was the empty, time he spent with the Lord. Unlike Judus the other apostles like Peter, treasure their time with the Lord, spent quiet time esp peter would was rebuked the most and even forsaken Him. But Peter learned, however Judus was a hypocrite so well that when he betrayed Jesus, Peter,James and Andrew was shocked. By studyin the word, it reminded me.. "How REal am I to the Lord".."Are the Time Spent during QT is it a Life changing one or just a boring ritual or burden?!" Of course I dun want to be like Judus but are my actions already leading me?! Anyway, during this June.. I gotta spent more Starbucks time with God. :D